I’m the Beast of the East and the Best in the West
October 25, 2011 Leave a comment
Seriously, you can look it up. Under Wee Thomas in the dictionary – well, as soon as they get around to adding me to the dictionary or at least creating my Wikipedia page. Frankly, I have no idea what’s taking so long. Short story long, I am awesome. Why am I awesome, let me count the ways:
- I have awesome friends. When I last attempted to enumerate people I consider friends – true friends, not people that I know through others and happen to spend time with them because of our mutual friendships – essentially if all it takes for you to disappear from my life (or vice versa) is someone else dying, we’re not really friends are we? (assuming I did not kill or engineer the death of said person) – I didn’t get past using my fingers and toes. And I thought about this for a while and found that I’m mostly happy with it.
- I am killer at words with friends (within the current group of people that I play). A lot of my acquaintances and a few friends play the game. Every once in a while, someone I haven’t played yet starts a game with me. There are a few stubborn people who play 5-10 games before they apparently give up – I suppose it can be soul crushing to lose every time. Only those that manage to beat me from time to time continue playing. And those games are awesome. I’m even dating someone in the winner’s circle. . . though she really needs to step up her game. I actually had a discussion with a couple people almost a month ago about playing against women that you’re dating. The unanimous decision, beat them as hard, mercilessly and often as possible.
- I’m dating an awesome woman. Seriously, pure awesome. Aside from allergies – just how often can a guy come close to killing someone in a month. I’m going to have to stop cooking until I have a complete inventory of everything on the bad list. There is one issue. . . she’s a dog person, I’m a cat person. I will be getting a kitten soon. Who will be trained to be an attack cat. I’m currently formulating the training regimine. For now, we’ll see how things go. Frankly, cats are too cute for anyone to resist. Also, my attack cat will be trained in a foreign language.
- I’m making progress on my research work. This is good, because progress equals getting closer to being done and being done means that my parents stop bothering me about when I’m getting done, and start bothering me about something else. Frankly, I’m not sure what that something else would be . . . Buying a house? Getting married? Becoming the Godfather?
- I can flip like the best of them. That’s right, I bought a “non-running” car with a few cosmetic issues for a song. The issue, blown fuse. No joke. The big cliche in diagnosis – “When you hear hoofbeats, look for horses, not zebras” is even funnier and more ironic if you knew the full context of the purchase. Sadly, only one other person will ever know this, though by the time she gets around to reading this blog, she’ll probably have forgotten.
That’s the list for now. I would continue, but my good deed for the day is