The Silent Rejection

I weighed in at 208.2lbs today and I swear this post looked much longer when composed on my phone.

Recently I have found myself in the unusual situation of having to inform women that I don’t see a relationship in our future. Unusual in that women are typically the ones doing the rejecting and I tended to apply a strict set of rules when deciding which women to approach. However, I’ve recently relaxed my adherence to those rules and have found myself in situations that I did not even anticipate that the rules were previously shielding me.

The latest example concerns a young woman I met slightly over a month ago while she was celebrating her birthday. I got her number, we texted a bit and made plans to go bowling. From when I picked her up to when I dropped her off, I always felt like I was being kept at arms length. I never did get that feeling that there could be more between us than hanging out. She was going away that weekend and a couple days later texted me about my plans for the following week. I responded that I didn’t have any and got nothing back from her. So I took it as a further sign of disinterest and promptly forgot about her. Then last night, in what appears to be a drunk text, she asks why I don’t like her. And I had to decide do I respond or ignore. But I thought about it and felt if I were in a situation where it bothered me enough to ask, intoxicated or not, I would want an answer. So I told her.

I get people being nervous on dates. But sometimes it doesn’t click. Last year, I went out with another women whom at first seemed distant. But by the end of the date things were much better. So much so that though I’d not yet gotten that I’d really like to see where this goes feeling, I felt I should give it a chance. And I would’ve done so, had I not met the women who would become my latest ex. Still, I wonder, should I even have responded? Our should it be like a breakup – keep it short, clean, and no follow ups?


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